Holes To Heaven
by Alby
Summary: When Rodney is turned into a 17 year old on a mission, the team find out more about him than they ever thought they would.
1. Chapter 1

**This story came out of nowhere, it may be my first long fic let me know if you want me to carry it out because I'm really not sure if I should. Its also not beta'd sorry!**

**Disclaimer: not mine, wish they were, Christmas is 6 months away so if you'd like to give them as a gift I would gratefully accept.**

* * *

When Dr Rodney McKay hobbled into Dr Heightmeyer's office around 8:30am (Atlantis time), she never expected to get so much from him. Considering he was ordered here after a particularly disastrous mission. He was currently sporting a broken ankle in its own cast and his very own top of the market concussion that was doing its best to take him from the smartest man on Atlantis to just a normal genius. He was also 17 years old. And couldn't remember a thing since that's happened since he really was that age.

The mission was supposed to be a meet and greet with the locals, but since when do they ever happen? The day started off normal enough, upon entering the gate room easy patterns situated themselves between Major Sheppard and Rodney.

_"Nice of you to join us McKay"_

"Least I could do Major, you're all dressed up and such. You even did your hair."

"I would of worn something different if I knew we were going to match, but I have to admit, the black and grey does wonders for your complexion compared to your usual beige."

"How are you feeling today Rodney?" Asked Dr Heightmeyer in her lively and professional tone.

"Fine. You?"

"Good thank you. How do you feel about what has happened to you."

"I don't know what happened to me, I woke up with a broken ankle in a field, I thought I'd fallen out of a tree or something. Then Jack..."

"John"

"…..John, told me he'd explain everything soon and that we had to keep moving, he had a gun so I didn't want to argue." Young McKay said with a hint of fear. There was something else in his eyes she couldn't quite distinguish. He almost looked the same, younger obviously, but if anything this version of Rodney looked haunted for lack of a better word.

"How did you feel when everything was explained to you"

"I thought somebody was playing a joke on me, I understood everything they were saying but I didn't want to accept it, I still don't." Replied Rodney seriously.

"How about we leave that for now, tell me about you. What's the last thing you remember doing"

"I was arguing with my dad, he threw me out of the house, I don't think he intended for me to come quite this far though. His imagination wasn't that great." He said with a familiar hint of the sarcasm she was used to.. Heightmeyer noted that he still, twenty years younger, used his humour to deflect a serious situation. "Tell me about your argument Rodney." She explored carefully.

* * *

_"Dad, they want to move me to college early! They tried last year and you wouldn't let me, why won't you let me just go!"_

"Rodney, you're not as clever as everyone says, I don't care if they said you were cleverer than Einstein, you need to settle down and get a proper job instead of spending your life chasing the stars, you'll never get an closer to them than with your telescope so just give it up!"

"People have landed on the moon, people fly to space all the time, why can't you get it into your tiny little brain that its what I want to do."

"…….your nothing, you need a good job not a degree"

"…..I need to learn, I want to, just because your happy, reading your bible and blaming everything that you can't explain on God, doesn't mean I am"

"I will not have you speak this way in my house! You will not blaspheme, you will not disrespect me and you certainly won't spend your life thinking your something your not."

"You know what dad, I just realised my problem here, you're the one not intelligent enough to understand why I want to do what I want to do. You can't understand that I would want to do something that didn't involve being a lapdog to people that will always be better than me, your nothing, you put me down because your scared that maybe, just maybe I might be better than you, I can't believe its taken me this long to figure it out, your just a coward!" The slap came quick Rodney didn't know what had hit him until the sting in his cheek told his brain it was a backhand from the left. Sharp and swift, stings like a bitch. He was to shocked to react for a minute, couldn't process the fact his dad hated him because he wanted to learn. Rodney just couldn't understand, maybe his dad was right maybe he wasn't as intelligent as he thought. But those thoughts were quickly discarded when his father spoke.

"I have had enough of you, enough of all your whining, your lucky I didn't hit you harder." Something snapped in Rodney, he realised his dad wasn't in control anymore and replied:

"No dad, your lucky I didn't hit you back"

"GET OUT! OUT OF MY HOUSE NOW! And don't ever come back." His father spat. So he left.

* * *

"That's the last thing that happened to you? Your father threw you out of your home?" Heightmeyer asked disgusted, she had never received anything but encouragement from her family.

"Yeah, it wasn't the last thing that happened. That was around a week ago, haven't spoken to him since don't really want to." He replied with a detachment a 17 year old shouldn't be able to muster.

"Where did you go? If this happened a week ago, where have you been staying?"

"I went to a friends house. I know him from some college courses I took over the summer, he's 22 so he's got his own place. I'm actually dating his sister. Have been for 8 months. Look my head is starting to hurt, you mind if we carry this on tomorrow?" He knew he was bailing he knew he'd have to explain more and more to her and just didn't feel like spilling all of his guts at once to a complete stranger, from the future in a floating city in another galaxy. He went to bed hoping that night to wake up in his adopted bed, next to Evie, with nothing more than his dad to worry about.


	2. Chapter 2

Usual disclaimer! Not mine :( never will be :( :( oh well. Rating for some bad-ish words. Not really bad though just a intsy wincy bit bad.

* * *

Dr Weir, Major Sheppard, Dr Beckett, Lt. Ford, Teyla and Dr Heightmeyer all sat around the briefing table discussing their subject. The one and only Dr Rodney McKay, various arguments were going around each having its own flaws. 

"Would you like to tell me from the beginning what happened on your latest mission, from what I can gather the locals were a friendly race, how did this happen?" Asked Elizabeth, being the leader of the expedition she had to be in control of each and every situation. Having her lead scientist wiped of his memory and regressed to a teenager did not account for being in control. Major Sheppard gave the nod to Ford to begin recounting the events that lead to their predicament.

"Ma'am the locals were a friendly race, they did nothing to threaten us whilst on the planet. Dr McKay was talking to one of their scientists while myself and Major Sheppard were near by discussing trading of goods. We deemed there was no threat ma'am."

_"McKay don't go far and play nice with the other kids, I don't want to have to haul your ass back to the gate because you got over excited about one of your gadgets." Said the Major in a tone that stemmed from one too many missions spent running back to gate or jumper while he couldn't have been dawdling in the scenery taking in the only land he was likely to get close to other than the mainland. He loved flying and was learning to adapt to living on a floating city but sometimes he just missed good old mud under his feet. _

_"Yes Major, your oh so complimentary opinion of my social qualities leave a lot to be desired considering your usually the one who has me, a scientist running for my life on a regular basis when you decide to piss off the natives. I'm surprised I'm not continually in the infirmary due to various incidents…"_

"Enough McKay, I get the point. Just keep safe ok?" Major Sheppard and Dr McKay went through the usual banter before actually getting down to the point that the Major was just looking out for his scientist and McKay actually appreciated it.

"He was gone around 40 minutes, came back talking a mile a minute about a device he found that had some strange energy reading and he wanted to come back with full diagnostic equipment and maybe one of the linguists to translate some of the writing on the actual device itself." Put in Major Sheppard.

"Did he have any ideas on what this device was at all?" Dr Weir asked curiously.

"I believe Dr McKay knew very little of it due to the short time he had spent with the device, so Major Sheppard ordered us to go down to the cave where it was situated…" Began Teyla only to be interrupted by Sheppard,

"Look, this is all in the mission reports, can we not discuss how we get McKay back to his older self before its too late?" He said hotly.

"Major, if I dinnae know what did this to him I have little or no chance of actually helping him." Said Carson, who had until then, remained quiet.

"Lets jump forward to when the Dr. was turned into a 17 year old, shall we….." Dr Weir was interrupted as Rodney walked into the briefing room leaning heavily on his crutches. All eyes on him he began to shift nervously,

"Um, hey, I thought since your all talking about me I should at least be here, I mean it is me, I'd like to be involved, I don't know who you all are but if I really am 37 then I'd like to think I am still intelligent enough to, you know, be erm.. Involved." He tapered off when he realised Major Sheppard was smirking and that still, no one had spoken.

"Take a seat." Finally Major Sheppard said gesturing to the space next to him.

"Thanks Ja….John." Said Rodney with a point to John on the almost mistake, index finger stretched out, thumb bent and the rest of his finger curled into his palm. It was such a McKay mannerism Elizabeth found herself fascinated by him. He was shorter, and his facial features were less defined, he seemed to have the most unruly hair known to man, unlike the Major's which was just odd and unnatural Rodney's seemed almost planned in its chaos, if the Major's was gravity in its consistency then Rodney's was the chaos theory in the only constant being…chaos. His clothes hung loose on him, he was offered scrubs to wear but the thought of wearing pyjama's around the halls of Atlantis did not amuse him. So he stood there in Rodney's civvies. All eyes now on her, she did not realise she had been staring and quickly restarted the meeting.

"Ok, Rodney we were just discussing what happened on the planet that lead to this predicament. Can you shed any light on anything?"

"The last thing I remember is being at home, then I woke up in a field, my ankle hurt like hell, so did my head. Everything was pretty jumbled up, there running, definitely running. I really don't remember all that much, at all." He said quickly with an uneasy nervousness, his eyes darted from person to person as he spoke , finally resting on the table top as he tapered off. Carson's gaze shifted to meet John's before Elizabeth spoke,

"Its ok, you don't have to remember it all now its fine." Elizabeth said cautiously.

"Do you remember how you broke your ankle Rodney?" Asked Heightmeyer. Just as he was about to answer John stepped in.

"He doesn't remember." He said with a smirk.

"Oh I so do. The details are just a little sketchy is all." Replied Rodney.

"You don't remember"

"I do"

"Do not"

"Do too"

"Do not!

"GENTLEMEN PLEASE!" Elizabeth intervened. "thank you, if you have finished the details of Rodney's broken ankle, whether he remembers getting it or not"

"………..Which I do"

"………….Or don't." Rodney first, then John added,

"Whether or not he remembers getting it," she punctuated the last line with a look towards the both of them who at least had the grace to know when to shut-up , "is not of concern here. Now Rodney I know this is hard for you, not knowing anyone, but at your age, as bright as I assume you are, are still not the Rodney we know. Now we need him back, and we need to know what happened on the planet which lead to your situation now. This is what we were discussing before you joined us. I would like to carry on, what happened after your team went to investigate the device Major?"

_"So McKay what do think it does?" Asked John as they were walking to the ruins._

"It could be an ancient power source. There is evidence from the architecture in the city that ancients may have populated these areas. It seems well ahead of the culture now living here. It would be interesting to see if any of them have the ancient gene. I don't know whether they are actual descendants of the ancients or they may just be regular settlers." "

So McKay, what do think it does?" At this McKay stopped walking and turned on the Major.

"You are the most annoying man I have ever met! " John gave his best Who Me? Look. "and yes you, don't look at me like that you ask a question and I answer it! Then you just completely ignore everything I say! What's the point in asking in the first place!" McKay practically shouted, causing Teyla and Ford who were scouting ahead to turn and look back at the exchange.

"Are you alright McKay? You seem a little edgy today. Judging by that out burst, that I am willing to ignore, you seem, I don't know more arsey than usual." John asked lightly but the concern was evident in his voice.

"ARSEY? Is that even a word Major? And no I'm not being 'arsey' I think your just being especially annoying today. So if you don't mind I'm going to go on ahead, I'll see you at the ruins, I'm sure you can find you way, it is only after all a ten minute walk!" And with that he turned on his heel and stormed off. Teyla had dropped back to talk with John, as Ford scouted ahead alone.

"I think there is something bothering Dr McKay, he does not seem himself." Teyla said gently.

"I agree with you Teyla, but he really doesn't want to talk about it. I'll catch up with him later and have a chat." He said, eyes never leaving the direction Rodney had gone. He knew there was something wrong but really couldn't guess what. He dropped into step with Teyla as they caught up with Ford, it was only a short walk to the caves so John assumed McKay had already arrived. The planet was deemed safe earlier on and John had no objection to letting McKay cool off before he went and interrupted an intense study of the artefact. He ordered Ford and Teyla to stand guard outside while he went in to chat the irreverent scientist. The device was held in a cave at the end of a narrow tunnel only really wide enough for one person to walk down, it had a creepy feeling John decided and as he was around five meters from the cave entrance he heard an intense scream that sounded a lot like McKay.

"Ford, Teyla! I need you back here now!" John shouted. As he entered the cave he saw McKay in a heap by the device. He rushed over to where his friend lay and turned him over. There was no question it was McKay, but he was nothing more than a teenager. Checking hi pulse he found it strong if a little fast and his breathing regular, he had cut on his temple from where he must of fell though which had John concerned concussion but had no time to dwell as Teyla and Ford rushed in. Ford's eyes went wide as he saw McKay and Teyla looked just as shocked.

"What happened, sir?" Asked Ford.

"Good question" Was the only reply he got. Wondering what could of happened himself, John scouted the surrounding area, a quick look from the device to McKay lead him to think that touching it maybe wasn't such a good idea. "We can send a team back, we need to get him to Atlantis, now."

"It wasn't until we were almost at the Stargate he began to stir." Major Sheppard supplied.

"I don't remember any of it. I remember you telling me to stay calm at that all would be explained. My ankle hurt and my head hurt and I really couldn't concentrate. I thought it was a joke cooked up by Tommy. I was amused at first because it looked like he'd put a lot of effort into it, but jokes never lasted this long before." Rodney put in.

"He was pretty out of it, kinda mumbling, its understandable he doesn't remember breaking his ankle"

"…….I"

"OK, I think we can call it time for this meeting ladies and gentlemen." Dr Weir said quickly before the argument could get started again. "we'll send a team back to the planet to study the device and meanwhile, if the members of your team would like to show you around the base I have no problem with that." Elizabeth said warmly. "Dismissed." At that everybody filed out of the room and left her alone to get her thoughts in order over the whole situation.


	3. Chapter 3

Just a little comic interlude before we start on the angst. Well I hope the humour doesn't fall too short, thanks for the reviews!

Usual disclaimer, not mine :(

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"Sooooo McKay, you ever been on a military base in another galaxy before?" Sheppard asked.

"Yeah sure all the time, I try and make it to one every third weekend but you now, I usually find myself busy with…….what is it? _Reality_." At that Lt Ford could barely hold back a snigger and Teyla merely smiled. "why do you call me that by the way? I mean, call me by my last name."

"Well, I don't know, its just easier in the field you know, I can call you Rodney if you want. Its not a problem"

"Yeah, all this second name stuff is a bit, weird. It makes me feel old. I don't really wanna feel old considering I already am its very weird, and I'm freaking myself out so I think I'm just gonna stop talking right now…jump in anytime you want." Rodney rambled on, someone may say he was annoying but his three team mates found it amusing. He was like their very own McKay without the stress of a city on his shoulders.

"Hey talk as much as you want Doc, I'm sure you might actually say something if you talk enough." Ford put in. McKay being the age he was, he found it easier to talk to him, somehow. Lt Ford, was one of the youngest members of the expedition, now having a 17 year old tagging along gave him a sense of authority that really didn't last long once Rodney replied, stopping his thoughts on that subject going any further.

"Doc, I like it, Dr Rodney McKay, inevitable really, I mean, like I wasn't ever going to get my doctorate. Hey, scrap Rodney, or McKay call me Doc!" He said jokingly, but Sheppard never one to miss out on an opportunity to banter with McKay put in:

"Yeah you can be like the Doc from Back to the Future"

"Like who?" Rodney looked curious, then realisation dawned on the rest of the team, except Teyla who looked just as curious and unaware as Rodney.

"The Doc, Back to the futu………..hold what year do you think it is?"

"1985, why? Whoa, if I'm supposed to be 37 its 2005 right? Now ok, maybe it's the whole alien base/different galaxy thing, but why has this just hit me! This is amazing! What's happened in the past 20 years? Come on! This is…wow. I don't know what….just ok, wow."

The enthusiasm in young Rodney's voice was awe inspiring and Sheppard found himself growing to really like young McKay, as did Teyla and Ford.

"Well, later on in your year, they'll release a film called Back to the Future, with Michael J. Fox and Christopher Lloyd about a kid who can travel through time, he's starts to mess stuff up but then he's gotta put stuff right, it's a great movie. He's only 17 aswell. We should call you Marty not Doc. Ha, I like it! Marty McKay!" Sheppard didn't try to hide his amusement, neither did Lt Ford, but Teyla didn't quite understand and Rodney, seemed to still be in awe over the whole 20 years time thing. Until it suddenly hit him…

"The kid out of Family Ties, makes a film where he can travel through time, in what? And how? And, what the hell? That's cool. So I take it Christopher Lloyd plays..."

"….the Doc, and they can travel through time in a nuclear powered DeLorean"

"WHAT? That's so impossible I'm not even gonna get started on that, but if your so hell bent on calling me Marty, thenwhich one of you isthe Doc?" He punctuated his remark with such a typical McKay smugness grin that at this point Sheppard could not hold back his laughter, he silently swore to himself that if McKay wasn't on crutches he would have done the patented finger snap/chin jut. Ford and Teyla were also having trouble controlling themselves, even though Teyla still didn't fully understand. "what? Did I miss something?" Rodney asked, interested in his three companions sudden fit of giggles.

"Nothing Marty just not the first time we've had this discussion is all!"

"Dr….I'm sorry, Rodney, I think the Major and Lt Ford find it amusing that though you are only 17 years of age you still have all the same principals as your older self." That was enough to send the other two over edge into uncontrollable laughter. It was infectious it seems, because soon McKay found himself feeling more comfortable with these companions and could understand why his future self was proud to call them friends.


	4. Chapter 4

**I am really sorry it has taken so long to update this fic. There was a death in the family and just recently have I felt up to coming back to it and giving it my full attention. Aswell as starting college, I have just had alot to do. I hopefully will be able to update more often now. Hope you enjoy it. There is a description of blood and the aftermath of suicide, a scene of the suicide is described - not any of the main characters and not in graphic detail. **

**Disclaimer: Not mine won't ever ever be.**

* * *

_Rodney put the key in the hole and turned. He walked into the house surprised by its quietness, student housing seemed to constantly have some noise going on, whether it was the TV, music or general chatter of voices discussing some deep meaningful subject. Today though, there was nothing. He walked through the hall, into the lounge, the kitchen and no one was around. Accepting that they'd just gone out Rodney moved upstairs to get changed and start some work - after getting something to eat that was. As he walked past a few doors before getting to his a noise caught his attention. The TV in James's room was on even quietly; as he stepped through the door the first thing that hit him was the smell. Metallic on the tip of his tongue he could taste the blood in the air, his eyes were drawn to James's body on the bed - wrists slit and eyes open, lifeless and cold. For a second he couldn't move, couldn't speak, and couldn't even think. Suddenly his legs came back to him and he was running for the phone, calling for help and hearing sirens, seeing the lights flash turning the room before him into a Technicolor display of death and sadness. Then silence and the tears come, the tears come and they don't stop. _

Rodney woke up, cold from sweat, sick to the stomach and shaking uncontrollably. He looked around not finding his room but an infirmary type place. Then he remembered where he was, what had happened to him and it was all he could do to hold back the tears. All he could feel was cold, empty, alone. No one was here; he always had trouble making friends his intelligence was at the cost of the life long buddies you'd meet in little schools. Then he'd left home, arguments will his dad had no avail, he gave up and just left.

The first few days in college were awkward and he had trouble talking to new people, then as he went for a drink at the bar on campus he'd met Josh, James and Tommy. There was no where to sit and they asked if they could share his table, he was happy to oblige and they'd got talking. They were interested in whom he was what he had to say and they were just as sarcastic and witty as he was. If not as intelligent a voice had told him.

A year and a half later they were living together with Anna, Tommy's girlfriend. Rodney had split with the girl he was seeing, too much of a strain, she said he was too egocentric, to wrapped up in his work, too passive. When she told him she was leaving he didn't argue. The fact that he now had good friends and people who existed that he got on with shared things with had let him get over her much quicker than he thought possible. That was a year ago, everything had changed soon after that, James had killed himself. It all came back to quickly for Rodney; he was in an unfathomable situation and was still so shut off from the world he couldn't focus on.

The last year floated by, he worked, went home slept, woke up, worked and repeated his routine day after day. All that got him through was still having Josh and Tommy. Now they had seemed to have gone. He was on his own in another galaxy with no one he knew and he was supposed to be a genius physicist (which he always knew he would be) who was lead scientist on expedition to this corner of the universe. He felt his breathe quicken as if it was suddenly in short supply. He needed to get out of the infirmary, get somewhere else, somewhere he could think.

Rodney leaned over to where his crutches were resting against the night stand and levered himself up and onto the floor. Sneakily checking for nurses on duty, only to find one, he managed to silently make it out of the door to freedom.

* * *

"What do you mean you've lost him?" John Sheppard said loudly enough so the whole infirmary could hear him.

"I mean Major that Rodney is no longer in the infirmary and we don't know where he is." Carson replied in tones that clearly expressed his frustration.

"How did you lose him, he's 17 years old and on crutches for Christ's sake."

"Well Major it is still Rodney and he is still a sneaky get when he wants to be, I doubt that has changed in twenty years." At that point Elizabeth had walked in, with Teyla and Ford in tow.

"Carson, what happened?"

"He lost Rodney." Sheppard put in.

"I didn't lose him he snuck out, so maybe Major if you spent less time shouting at me over this and more time looking for the boy this situation will be easily corrected!" Sheppard couldn't argue with that so he just turned to Ford and said: "I want three teams, you lead one, Teyla lead on and I'll take one. No need in spooking him out with people he doesn't know. Carson you're with me."

"Yes sir." Ford replied easily though he was looking anything but comfortable. Teyla agreed with the Major's plan and left immediately soon followed by Ford. Elizabeth watched them go then turned to John,

"Find him."

"I won't come back without him, Carson, you ready to go"

"Let me get my kit." The doctor replied.

Rodney sat huddled on a balcony, he didn't know where it was but after walking, or hobbling for the best part of an hour he'd given up when he'd found this secluded spot. This is where he had been sitting for the past hour, it was cold but he seemed numb. Unaware of the pain in his head, the itchiness beneath his plaster or the people standing at the door behind him.

* * *

"Look, he doesn't know the city that well, this isn't our McKay, well it is, but it isn't. He can't have gone that far, check out the sensor array, find the lone dot and we'll zone in." John was worried about his friend, he may not of known him when he was this age but he knew him now and he was still the same person. "get Zelenka in here." John and his team were assembled in the control room. Ten minutes later the small Czech ran in ready to help. "Zelenka, we need you to find McKay. He's gone missing from the infirmary. We were using the hand held life signs detectors but we can't see any thing that looks like McKay, we need to search further a field."

"Major, Rodney does not know city like our Rodney. He could have gone anywhere - dangerous, we have experiments on the outskirts of city, you have teams looking yes?" Zelenka spoke quickly; John was quite impressed at the Czech's loyalty and care for the well being of McKay but quickly sobered at the thought of this. "Ford?" He keyed his radio and asked the young lieutenant his whereabouts.

"We are about half an hour from the control room sir."

"I need you to go to the location I give you, don't touch anything, the brains of this operation are conducting some experiments there, we don't want Rodney stumbling on them."

"Yes sir." After co-ordinates had been given and bases guarded and Zelenka had hopefully, found Rodney. The one little dot further out of the city than the life signs detector could manage was a like a homing signal, and they were zoning in. when they finally reached their destination they saw Rodney huddled on the balcony not doing much of anything except looking downright cold and miserable. John turned to the group,

"Let Teyla and Ford know we've found him. You stay here I'm going to talk to him"

"Major ifs he's hurt….." Carson went say but John interrupted, "I'll come get you. I don't want him freaking out at too many people around him"

"Aye Major, okay."

And with that John slowly walked onto the balcony and hunkered down next to his friend.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey, in case you're wondering where Teyla was she will be around. Lets just say shes on the Mainland for now. Thanks for the reviews!**

**Disclaimer: NOT MINE! I get the point. **

"Hey." John said, Rodney turned sharply and looked at him as if he didn't notice John had walked onto the balcony and sat down beside him. Before letting concern fully control his emotions, he took a good look at Rodney. He wasn't crying or angry or even scared, he just looked numb, hollow. As Rodney turned away it occurred to John that, that frightened him more than anything. "You okay?" McKay just nodded. Afraid he was shutting himself off from everyone John tried to prompt McKay into talking. "Are you hurt?" A shake of the head… "Why did you leave the infirmary?" At that McKay turned to him again with desperation evident on his features,

"One of my lecturers has the view that the best description of time that he can come up with is 'Time is something that is measured by clocks'. What kind of clock measures this? What equation can I write down to explain why this is happening?" John had no answer so he just waited for him to continue. "By clocks he meant anything, a rotating pulsar in space, a tap of a foot, a beat of a heart. My heart still beating the same, 20 years of age and stress may be making my blood pressure higher, but right now I'm still 17, my heart is beating, my foot would be tapping if it wasn't in a plaster cast. The clocks are different though. For the first time in my life I don't have a theory. I don't have a clue why or how but I know when and it scares me." At that moment he looked impossibly young, too young to go through all of this. Too young to carry such a burden and if he could have John would have taken it all away for him.

"Why don't we just go inside, get warm. We can talk about it then." John was trying to comfort him but was unsure of what else he could do. McKay silently pulled himself up and went to grab for his crutches but John had already got to them and handed them over. As he reached out for them he swayed on his feet slightly and John went to catch him but the crutches bore his weight. "You ok? I can get Carson…"

"I'm fine." He left no room for argument. It wasn't a long walk to the infirmary but most of the time was taken up by the pace at which they were walking. Rodney's steps were becoming more and more sluggish and the crutches were unable to hold him up when his legs buckled and he went down hard. Carson rushed forward muttering under his breathe about things never changing.

"Carson?" John asked worriedly.

"I don't know yet Major, it's possible his hypoglycaemia or it could just be exhaustion, we need to get him to the infirmary."

* * *

With some well positioned arms they managed to get Rodney to the infirmary without having to call for a stretcher. Once they had reached the infirmary Dr. Beckett checked him over finding him dehydrated, exhausted and feverish. Deducing that he was probably coming down with the flu, Carson couldn't believe he'd get the flu with such bad timing. After letting the rest of the team know he set off to his office to carry on reading through the research the linguists had turned out from the device that changed old Rodney to young Rodney in moments. 

Two days past and John, Ford and Teyla were on their way to see Rodney. They walked into the infirmary to find McKay sitting in bed looking downright miserable. He had rosy coloured cheeks, he was sniffling and every other word he was saying to Carson was punctuated with a cough.

"Hey." He said when he had saw they'd walked in. "No Carson, no more, stop." He said as he turned to the doctor.

"Hey, what's Carson doing?" John asked.

"He's a doctor and feels he isn't doing his job if he isn't poking me something. No more needles, I don't want the IV and no I have eaten enough oddly coloured foods to last a lifetime thank you. Please just leave me alone." It was almost like looking at and listening to the older McKay.

"He's just trying to help doc, right doc?" Ford put in.

"Yes, as a matter of fact I am but as it turns out he's a stubborn bugger no matter the age." Amusement evident in his voice. After two days with him in the infirmary Carson had formed a bond with the 17 year, finding him not so different. Quieter but as the hours dragged on he had gained more confidence around him and they had talked more and more.

"When will he be up and about doc?" Sheppard asked choosing not to bait the doctors further.

"I don't know yet, as long as he rests I cant see it being much longer."

"I am sitting right here, in plain view." McKay cut in. the others just chuckled.

Later on that evening McKay was sitting in the infirmary twiddling his thumbs bored to tears. He'd counted the ceiling tiles done an A to Z of famous scientists listing their theories in order of importance and coming up with a few of his own. He had no computer, no cards, no energy. Miserably he rolled over onto his side and decided to stare at the nurse until she looked up, then as soon as she did he'd close his eyes. Watching her get more and more paranoid he repeated his exercise several times but soon got bored. Rolling back onto his back he stared at the ceiling, 523 tiles. Prime. 523 multiplied by the number of people who had walked through the door since he'd been awake - 12, 6,276. Not prime. The amount of years he'd lost. 20. Not prime. 20 multiplied by how old he was now. 17. 340. How much had he lost. What had he done in those 20 years. How many scientific break trough's, how many more people had he lost, pissed off, pushed away, how many girlfriends, how many meals, how many more times did he have to tell Carson he felt fine. Giving in he flopped back over on to his side and closed his eyes. Sleep didn't come immediately but eventually darkness over took him.

He woke to the sound of John Sheppard bickering with Ford. "The old Star Wars films are classics, George Lucas spent the first half of his life making the best films ever made and spent the second half wrecking them."

"I don't deny they were good sir. I'm just I haven't seen the originals so I have nothing to compare them to."

"That's what I'm trying to say Ford. You haven't seen Star Wars until you've seen the first one." He replied to the young lieutenant.

"I preferred The Empire Strikes Back." Rodney put in as he sat up. Sniffled and promptly sneezed.

"See he's seen them and he's had less time than you." Sheppard said giving Ford a reproachful look. Then before he could reply turned to Rodney and said: "how are you feeling?"

"Better thanks. Carson has stopped hovering so I think I'm a lot better. Think he'll bring me some real food? Those military things were really nice." Ford rolled his eyes and turned to Sheppard letting the older man reply.

"I think we can sneak some in if he says no. they are supposed to be nutritional."

"Thanks, I need real food. That doesn't mover on its own and isn't electric blue." At that point Ford looked at his watch and had to go for guard duty, giving Sheppard a proper chance to talk to McKay.

"You sure you're feeling alright? I mean…" Sheppard said apprehensively.

"Yeah, the other day, it just got a bit too much. I feel like I'm dreaming but not. Its like I've lost my keys to my very own Tardis." Sheppard chuckled at his statement but still got the seriousness of the situation.

"You know, you haven't really changed all that much."

"No, I always wished I'd be a bit taller. I think I'd have taken a hair cut. You know, but trade off for my genius I suppose." The completely straight face with which this was said put Sheppard at ease. It was McKay nothing more and 20 years less.

"Well, I don't think we have chicken soup but I'm sure we can bring you a M.R.E, I'm sire they are superior in your opinion anyway. And I'd like to think I don't look like your mother when I'm doing this motherly stuff. So no comments."

"My mom never brought me chicken soup when I was ill."

"Was there an alternative in the McKay household?"

"There was nothing, you dealt with it. She'd say she 'I didn't give birth to you to be your servant.' I just accepted it, didn't know there was much else anyone could do when you're sick anyways." John took a minute to take in this information. Whenever he was sick his mom would bring him chicken soup, then milk and cookies for dessert. Something that simple missing from your life seemed to leave a big hole in his memories. The lack comforts like that made him wonder what else McKay had missed out on in his childhood. Realising he'd been quiet for a few minutes he looked at Rodney , who had seemed to apply all his energy into unthreaded one of Carson's blankets that was currently covering him. Sensing a change of subject was in order he went ahead and did so.

"Wanna play a game?" he asked.

"What game?"

"Well we haven't got any cards, or a laptop, or anything…prime not prime?" he asked wondering if the younger McKay was familiar with the game. And it seemed he was.

"Sure. You can go first." he'd replied.

"1193." Easy one to start off John thought.

"Prime. 1126."

"Not prime. 2342."

"Prime. 4446."

"Not prime. 6983." John had asked, McKay obviously had the smarts he'd boasted about. Just then Carson walked in before Rodney had chance to answer. He was carrying electric blue jelly. The frown instantly appeared on Rodney's face, a look of distaste crossed his features before he turned to John, eyebrows raised as if to say 'See, what did I tell you.'

"Hey Carson, when is he allowed real food?"

"As soon as he eats the food I give him. Instead of just picking at the stuff, I think it'll be alright tomorrow if he eats all his meals today." Carson said approvingly.

"You know, again sitting here and having never been mothered, I havegotten quite used to it. I haven't even lived at home for two years. You can leave out the protective parent stuff. I don't eat it all 'cos I'm not hungry. Not to spite you." Rodney said shortly.

"Hey, I think may have regressed because in 20 years we have to drag you out of the lab to eat your meals. It isn't protective parent stuff - its protective friend stuff. Now eat your jelly." John said with a smirk. Carson just shook his head and walked off talking about stubborn Canadians, but there was a glimmer of amusement in his eyes. Rodney just scowled at John and began to munch on his 'nutritional food'.


	6. Chapter 6

**I am trying not to make this angsty every chapter. The angst shall return though. Hi-jinx ensue. Enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: not mine. but I wrote Romeo and Juliet so nergh.**

* * *

Rodney was released a few days later; he was shown to his quarters. Elizabeth accepted that it was still Rodney, and although he could go down to the labs he wasn't to be hassled or forced into working. He did that by choice. It seemed that since he had absolutely no responsibilities he was completely relaxed and almost completely himself. Once he got talking to Zelenka, he wasn't to be dragged away and Zelenka seemed all too happy to have power above Rodney for once. It seemed the small Czech had a soft spot for the boy though and did appreciate a new way of looking at things. This McKay was ego-centric, but who wasn't when they were 17 and a complete genius? The sarcasm was there too, no as biting as he could be but he had an evil sense of humour. It fitted in with Zelenka's perfectly. Working on a new idea which would re-route power from a puddle jumper to a naqudah generator to recharge it, they had made steady progress. When it came to the end of the evening, the Czech decided a celebratory drink was in order. Quite possibly the best or worst idea he had ever had. McKay quickly agreed and only after the third shot of Prime A Patented Zelenka Still Gin, the effects were becoming a little more noticeable. After the fifth shot and much more hi-jinx a thought hit the Czech.

"You're not old enough to drink!" he stated with all the seriousness he could muster.

"I am too! Time is relative…in Atlantis, I am 37, at home I am not allowed to drink, here, its fine!" Rodney replied and it took Radek a second to think.

"Your body 17, your mind 17, your team…don't have to know! Major Sheppard would not be so happy, nor Carson I fear…and Elizabeth." with that the Czech shook his head in sadness. "No I fear she would not be pleased either."

"I have been in college for two years, drinking is part of life…I drink, I got to lectures I work. I am perfectly capable of learning with a hangover, 17 or no." He took another swig to prove his point.

"Yes, I start college at 18, body not so prepared, I drink before but not on that…consumption, erm…word, ah ha level of consumption." he looked thoughtful for a moment and they seemed the have hit a slump in the conversation until, "AH!" Radek shouted making Rodney jump, "Legal drinking age in Czech Slovakia…"

"What's Czechoslovakia?" McKay asked.

"You do not know, no it is still Czech Socialist Republic! Czechoslovakia, new name. More politics involved but it's as you say, soft science, too complicated. But as I was going to say legal drinking age in Czechoslovakia…"

"Is 18." McKay supplied.

"No your are wrong my young friend…wrong, the legal drinking age is as soon as you can get to the bar! Ha, you are tall enough and is no bar. You're drinking…meh, fine!" Radek said with a swish of the arm and a smug smile. Then his head started to droop, eyes closing. At that point he was poked in the side with one of Rodney's crutches. Abruptly he woke and stared at his companion. "What?"

"You were falling asleep."

"I am tired."

"Lightweight."

"I have much work, I am tired."

"Old. I suppose not all of us are blessed with youth and ox like constitutions." McKay said smugly.

"No, I suppose we aren't, so I sleep now. In quarters. I see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I'll drop by. Hey Radek?" the Czech turned. "Thanks. For today, showing me around the labs, I appreciate it"

"No problem my friend. Time seems to be on your side more now." and with a small wave he turned and left.

Rodney knew it was no good going to bed with this much alcohol in his system. He looked towards the door Radek had exited through then turned to grab his crutches. He wasn't a sad drunk, when he was drunk he usually got funny and open. The biting sarcasm turned into God humour and sociability. Food came into mind, and drink of the non alcoholic type. Making his way to the mess, there was no one in the corridors and it occurred to him that Atlantis was a pretty spooky place at night. He didn't know his way around yet, he knew his way to the mess, because really, food is the first thing you remember how to get. As long as you fed you were happy.

Turning right he saw the entrance in all its glory and walking through the door and into the room he saw it was completely empty. Making his way over to the fridges/cupboards/freezers he leaned the crutches against the work top and looked for a snack. Coming across a bag of crisps and some chocolate bar type things he seemed happy. Moving over to the fridge he opened it and looked for something to drink, suddenly he heard a sound and stood up fast looking for the origin. Deciding he imagined it he turned back to the fridge and grabbed a can.

"Whatcha up to?" Rodney nearly jumped out of his skin.

"Jesus Major, you scared me. Damn it. That was not good, not funny either stop laughing." The can in his hand momentarily forgotten.

"You ok Rodney? You look a little off."

"I'm fine." He waved airily then turned back to the can a frown forming on his face.

"You sure?"

"NO! What the hell is this!" Rodney asked alarmed. John leaned over and saw what young McKay was holding. A grin eased onto his features.

"Of course you haven't seen Coke's new marketing campaign. Lemon Coke is all the rage now."

"It's ridiculous. Why would they do this? It's just wrong. You have coke…its Coke flavoured, its not fruity its just sugar and caffeine and nice. Why tamper with that? It's WRONG!". The flow of conciousness ended with a sway and McKay sat down heavily.

"Are you drunk?" John asked incredulously.

"No." Rodney replied shiftily. Then mumbled something under his breathe that Sheppard couldn't make out.

"What was that?"

"I said maybe a little. But just a little mind." he said with a frown opening his crisps beginning to munch away.

"Where did you get alcohol?" the Major asked though he had a pretty good idea.

"No where. Do you have anything to drink that doesn't have citrus in? I'm deathly allergic." Came from Rodney who had resumed rummaging through the fridge. John had to hold back a laugh. It was just getting too good.

"You're drunk. And you're 17. It's very amusing by the way."

"Legal drinking age is as soon as you can get to the bar in Czechoslovakia." Hook line and sinker.

"So a certain Czech enigneer sleep you the booze?" Knowing full well it was Zelenka.

"No. It was a was a Czech…botanist. His name was Felenka." Giving John the butter wouldn't melt in my mouth look. He didn't know if he was really trying to be serious or whether he was winding him up.

"Well I'll have to have words with this botanist. But between you and me. I don't mind, just make sure Elizabeth doesn't find out. She's not really strict, but she might find it irresponsible." Rodney just nodded deep in though looking at the chocolate like bar he held in his hand, holding it up he said:

"What's this?" John smiled.

"That my friend is a power bar. You live on them. And coffee."

"Can't taste too bad." He took a bite and looked mildy surprised. "that is so good."

"They are quite disgusting."

"Are not." Rodney replied petulantly.

"Are too." John made a note a drunk Rodney was a funny playful Rodney.

"Are not."

"Are too."

"Are not."

"Are too."

"Are not, no returns. HA."

"Okay McKay you got me there. I accept defeat in you're or so mature game."

"I am mature. Who's the older one here?" At that point John decided he'd had enough.

"Oh shut up. You should get some sleep, its way past your bedtime."

"Oh haha Major. My side you slay me." It lost all effect as Rodney yawned widely and his eyes began to droop.

"Come on off to bed with you." As he stood he heard a mumble come from the now still figure.  
"what was that?"

"I have absolutely no idea how to get to my quarters from here." McKay stated.

"Come on Sparky, Ill show you the way." Handing McKay the crutches the two men slowly made their way to Rodney's room. When they reached it they said their goodbyes and Rodney walked in and slumped onto his bed. Looking around the room in taking it all in he saw various degrees and awards. It was a great feeling to be able to see his achievements laid out in front of him. With a smile on his face he lay down and drifted off to sleep.


End file.
